I wanted to share some of the messages that repeatedly come up in readings with animals who have crossed over, hoping this might help someone who feels stuck in the grief of their loss.
Before I begin, I want to note that I do not pretend to know everything about the other side (I think there's a lot we cannot even fathom). This post is just based on my experiences from the past 5 or so years of talking to animals who have passed.
Guilt is a common part of the grieving process when we lose someone. These are the ones I see the most in my clients who have lost animals:
- That they were gone a lot of the time, and didn't spend enough time with them
- That they didn't realize that their animal was sick
- That they did suspect something was wrong, but didn't bring them to the vet in time
- That they weren't able to find the animal if the animal was lost (they didn't look enough, or not in the right places)
- That they did something unknowingly that contributed to their passing
- That they didn't try hard enough to help the animal through their aggression issues
- That they didn't give them enough attention
- Worry over whether or not euthanasia was the right choice for the animal
- Worry over whether or not the animal was confused about why they were being euthanized
- That they somehow unknowingly caused the animal more pain by not choosing or not getting the opportunity to choose euthanasia
This means that animals do not usually hold grudges when they cross over. In fact, they often show deep understanding and compassion for their human companions. I have never had an animal want my client to feel guilty about anything they did or didn't do.
(Of course, I have never had a client who intentionally tried to harm their animal companions. I have spoken to animals on the other side who expressed strong dislike of previous owners who were abusive, but not towards my clients.)
In a reading with an animal that has passed, they will usually show me the thing that my client feels guilty about. Then they might show me the circumstances of the situation (why the owner had to do the thing, or not do the thing). They do this to prove that they know why the client had to do that, and show that it's OK. They understand. There's nothing to forgive. Then they might prove that they are still around you, and most of all, they want to show you that they are more than fine on the other side.
In my experience, animals (just like humans) have a certain time they are meant to cross over. If they didn't pass in this one way, their soul would have found another way to pass soon anyways. Nothing that you did or didn't do could would have kept them here any longer. For whatever reason, their soul decided that this was the way to go now.
Often animals will share that they passed after helping their humans through a particularly difficult period. Their soul was done with their life-purpose, and so it was time to pass. I have also had animals share that they passed right before a period of big changes in their human's life, because they felt they could better help their humans through it from the other side (by helping to orchestrate events, etc).
I also have to mention that spirits have shared with me that deaths usually have a lot less suffering than we tend to imagine. Souls will leave their bodies before even the body has died in a lot of cases, (especially in very traumatic passings). Also, their loved ones and our loved ones help them cross over when it's time. Your beloved animals are never truly alone when they pass.
In my readings, animals will also share with me their happiest memories from when they were alive. These are the memories they want you to think of and focus on when you think of your animal companion. These memories and thoughts help lift your spirits, and can help you feel their presence around you even stronger. From doing this work, I also know that our animal companions love to be around us after they've crossed over. As soon as you think about them, they can feel that, and they'll draw closer. And they love to share in those beautiful memories you created together.
Sending you all lots of healing thoughts,